


Problem Solving (Is Best Left to Those Who Can Think Straight)

by Muucifer



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dirty Talk, Double Penetration, M/M, Multiple Orgasms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-27
Updated: 2014-01-27
Packaged: 2018-01-10 05:38:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1155752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Muucifer/pseuds/Muucifer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You want both of us? That’s good, because I’m sure Strider here wants to hear your lovely voice as much as I do."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Problem Solving (Is Best Left to Those Who Can Think Straight)

Dirk digs his fingers into John’s hair, pulling the boy to his chest and trapping him there with his other arm. Jake leans forward, dragging his tongue along John’s chest and swirling the pink muscle around a perky nipple. John squirms, bucking up towards Jake’s chest and trying to get some sort of friction on poor dripping cock. Jake backs up purposely, keeping himself away from John and nipping down onto his chest. The blue-eyed teen gasps and arches away from Dirk, who merely clutches him tighter and moans into his ear. The sound goes straight to John’s crotch, causing pre drip out and smear across his stomach.

“Say, Dirk, you’re not planning to keep my cute boy’s ass all to yourself are you? His mouth is nice, but I am quite fond of having my chance back there as well.” Dirk snorts at Jake, choosing to rut his erection against John’s backside instead of granting Jake with a response. Jake scowls, fingers reaching down to teases around the puckered entrance. “John my boy, what do you want? You want me to fuck your tight little hole? I bet you wanna suck Dirk’s cock don’t you?”

The brunette in question gives a long moan, hips jutting towards Jake at the light touches teasing around his ass. A bright grin from Jake is shot over his shoulder at Dirk who scoffs, “No way, John I bet ya want me to fuck ya nice and hard don’t ya? Jake doesn’t know how to fuck ya like ya like, does he? Come on babe, tell him about how his dick feels better in your mouth than in your ass.”

This time Dirk’s the one who reaches down, shooing Jakes fingers away. He bypasses John’s taint, instead grabbing his own erection and aligning it with John, the lube they had been prepping him with making their motions smooth. John whimpers, backing into the touch and pleading quietly for them to just fuck him already. Dirk doesn’t listen. His dick taunts John’s hole, catching on the ring before sliding away ineffectively. Dirk doesn’t put much pressure into it. He enjoys the feeling of John’s body quivering under his guidance. Jake drops down to mouth across John’s cock. His hot breath steams up his glasses as he places messy open-mouthed kisses along John’s shaft and up over the head. He laps his tongue along the slit, dipping the tip into it lightly before drinking down the pre that escapes.

John spasms, his body trying to curl in and buck out all at once. It’s too much, but not nearly enough. Their teasingly soft touches fire him up but don’t bring him close enough to the edge. He finds his voice, raspy and thick with need, “Oh godohgod please just fuck me I’m gunna die please I need you.” In unison, his tormentors chirp out, “Who?” John shivers, arching his body away from Dirk, his ass jutting back into Dirk’s hips. He buries his face in Jakes tousled brown locks and wheezes, “I don’t care you guys need to please just fuck me.”

Dirk and Jake catch each other’s eye, both raising an eyebrow at John’s answers. Dirks the first to speak up, “Both, you say? Ya want me to fuck your ass and then Jake to shove in as well? Well John, I think we can manage that. Jake and me can both fuck ya hard. Ya just want to be stretched around us, don’t ya? So fucking needy not even one cock can satisfy ya. Damn you’re gunna be so full.” His voice drags the last word, letting it curl around John’s ear and settle in his brain. John gives a mindless moan, body trembling and knees threatening to give out. Jake and Dirk’s hands catch him though, holding him up as Jake kisses his face all over.

“Mmm John you’re so cute.” John whimpers, tears forming in the corner of his eyes. He wanted them to do _anything_ besides talk dirty to him. The filthy images of both their cocks stuffing him full was making him reel and he wasn’t getting touched enough to relieve it. “Love we’re going to treat you so good. You want both of us? That’s good, because I’m sure Strider here wants to hear your lovely voice as much as I do. Hear you scream our names. Everything about you is perfect.” He finishes by wiping John’s tears away, the water glistening on his thumb only briefly before Jake licks it away. He hums into John’s ear, cocks sliding together as he scootches closer.

John keens a lovely tune when Dirk finally lets the head of his cock press up into John’s hole, the stretched entrance opening around him with slight resistance and then sucking him in like it can’t get enough. Dirk’s hands find John’s waist, latching on with enough grip to bruise and pulling him flush to his chest. John drops his head down, body quaking at the feeling of fullness that’s begun to settle in his gut. Jake carefully cups his jaw, tilting him up to kiss him. The tender touch becomes forceful when Jake tangles his hand in John’s hair and uses it to tug him closer still and control their movements. Dirk draws John’s attention back again when he gives a short thrust and seats himself the rest of the way in from where he’d been inching in. A muffled scream resounds through Jake’s mouth as John releases between them, hands shaking where they scrabble along Jake’s arms.

Dirk’s hips jerk and he groans, focusing on not moving too much as John’s inner walls clench and ripple around him. It’s hot, hot, hot around him, and John burns under his fingers. The brunette’s eyes are cloudy when Jake leans him back against Dirk’s chest and Dirk drinks in his euphoric face. Dirk brings one hand up to stroke John’s cheek, and mindlessly the younger male turns into the touch, voice mumbling their names airily like a prayer. They take their time kissing him and hugging him. Jake’s arms pry between Dirk’s chest and John’s back, pulling the youngest into his hold as he sprinkles kisses across the bridge of John’s nose. Dirk trails his hands down John’s sides in turn, savoring the feeling of John’s soft waist.

One of Jake’s arms disappears from around John, and Dirk wonders vaguely before he sees that shoulder of Jake’s shift up and down. Dirk plants a solid kiss to the underside of John’s jaw, working a hand down over Jake’s hip. The green-eyed boy is throbbing hard against John, his own hand wrapped around it and pumping quickly. Dirk shoos the hand away, replacing it with his own and Jake’s short fast strokes with his long slow ones. Jake swallows a moan, searching for Dirk’s face over John, before he can get too loud. Dirk kisses him hungrily, tongue dancing around his and diving into every corner of Jake’s mouth. He tastes him, moves across all the planes and bumps of his teeth and hard palate. Dirk muffles the loud moan that he elicits from Jake when he finally swipes his thumb over the leaking head of his cock.

He twirls his fingers around Jake, tightening and loosening rhythmically. It’s a song, one he can play only on their bodies. Dirk takes total control of the situation. Jake pretends to fight him for it, but they both know in the end Jake would follow his lead. Dirk squeezes just so and twists around the top. He massages the base and rolls Jake’s balls in his palm. Jake winds around John, who’s just starting to come back to reality. John drops a heavy hand into Jake’s hair and pets his fingers through the thick curls. John hums soft words of encouragement into Jake’s ear while Dirk leaves his own on Jake’s lips. John’s other arm loops around Jake’s waist, hugging him back while still leaving room for Dirk to fist his hand around Jake’s cock.

Dirk leaves his pace lazy, never giving Jake the pressure or speed he needs to reach his peak. He pushes him closer and closer, then pulls back and rubs along his thighs and stomach. He tweaks a nipple, dips his finger into Jake’s naval. The motion would be odd or childish in any other situation, but in this that slight pressure reminds Jake his dick is not being touched and Dirk is narrowly avoiding it. Just enough that the air from his movements brush across Jake’s heated flesh and leaves him bucking into air for more. John, no longer in a daze, slides one hand down alongside Dirk’s. Their fingers overlap and stroke Jake’s abs together, and John snakes his further until his clawing along Jake’s thigh and pawing at his ass.

It works Jake further and further, their teasing touches leaving him nearly begging. Finally, Dirk takes pity and goes back to his erection. He no more than gets his fingers hooked around the head and give him a sharp tug when Jake spills across John’s stomach and his hand. John pays special attention to the muscles under the pads of his fingers quivering. He dips a hand between Jake’s ass to prod at his unused entrance. Dirk feels it more than he sees it. Feels it in the way Jake pulses once more in his hand and his body arches against John. The extra weight on John pushes him back against Dirk’s cock, where it’s been resting not-so-patiently inside of him. Dirk groans, nipping at John’s ear.

Jake slumps against them, but the stiffness between his legs doesn’t dwindle at all. He’s still hard against Dirk’s gloves, the leather making it over-sensitive. With hardly a recovery, Jake works his way back down John’s chest, stopping to lap at each nipple and earning surprised gasps from John each time his tongue finds a pert bud. Dirk watches every twitch of their tiny lover’s face while Jake teases him back into arousal despite his body still sensitive from his last. He hums quietly into John’s ear, fingers caressing his jaw.

“John ya always take us so well. Your body is always ready for us, isn’t it? Ya can’t get enough of us. Such a pretty li’l cockslut.” John chokes off a scream with a whimpered moan at the name, and just as he sucks in a gulp of air, Jake swallows his now stiff cock in one go. Dirk looks over John’s shoulder, admiring the view of Jake’s lips parted around John, drool just barely leaking out of the corners. His cheeks bulge out as he works the head with his tongue. Dirk doesn’t notice he’s narrating until John sobs in his ear and begs him to stop. “Come on, baby don’t ya wanna watch Jakey suck your dick?” He slides the hand not on John’s face down and around until he can grab Jake’s jaw, feeling it move as Jake diligently bobs on the dick in his mouth. “Look at how pretty he is, Jake might like sucking cock more than you like getting’ fucked.”

Jake moans around John, the vibrations wracking John’s body as he arches backwards and finds release again. The erection on Jake’s tongue pulses and throbs, spilling down Jake’s throat as he swallows around the head and drinks it down. He slides off, lips and face red, panting. John spasms once more, and a few remaining drops splatter out across the bridge of Jake’s nose. Dirk, still trying desperately to keep his hips from thrusting of their own accord, yanks Jake up by his hair, a startled yelp being crushed by his lips. They meet messily over John’s shoulder, lips crashing together with the occasional tooth and tongue mixed in. Spit and spunk dribble down Jake’s jaw, dropping down onto John’s shoulder where he rests weak between them. Dirk jerks Jake back, only to drag his tongue across his face and lap up the mess that’s now smeared.

Dirk pulls his hip back, just an inch or so, and bucks back in. His voice slurs across John’s ear, “We’re gunna fuck ya so good. Make ya all sloppy ‘n loose. You’re never gunna want anything but both of us again.” Jake takes it as his cue and he gives Dirk a curious look. Dirk pushes back on his shoulder, forcing Jake onto the bed while he and John kneel over him. Jake gets the idea, and shimmies around until he’s lined up with John’s entrance as well. Dirk holds John over him, tutting disapprovingly at Jake. “Not so fast, gotta stretch our boy some more, don’t ya think?” Jake blinks up at him, then gives a dull nod and reaches back for the lube that was discarded to the side earlier. He slicks his fingers back up and, under Dirk’s guidance, presses one tan digit into the tight hole alongside Dirk.

John bites down on his lips, buckteeth worrying the pink skin as he struggles to not cry. He wanted it, god did he want it, but his willingness didn’t magically make the pain of being stretched beyond his usual limits go away. Jake’s finger eases into him, wiggling against Dirk’s cock and John’s walls at the same time. He can feel every slight ridge of John’s insides as they bump pass his finger. He’s mindful of his speed, and takes it easy until he’s in to the final knuckle. Dirk grits his teeth above him, having been sitting so close to the proverbial ledge for quite some time. Jake crooks his finger, and it increases the weight inside of John. He gasps, voice fading into a jumble of mindless words as Jake carefully begins thrusting his finger inside of John as best he can without stimulating Dirk or John too much.

One becomes two, and John feels tears drip down his cheeks but he can’t bring his hands up to wipe them away. They’re locked into Jake’s hair, pulling almost harshly. It doesn’t bother him too much; he’s too focused on the tightness around his fingers to think of much else besides how amazing it’d feel to have his dick in there. Pressed against Dirk, moving inside of John, feeling every single shift John’s body makes and the way his body has to accommodate the girth of both of them. Somewhere along his thoughts, he’s blank out Dirk’s reactions to his mindless rubbing of his fingers inside John. Dirk’s arms cinch around John, and he makes and honest attempt to not pin him down and fuck into him. Jake’s fingers unknowingly stroke him too, the backs of his knuckles pleasuring his cock with every bend.

Jake doesn’t notice what he’s done until Dirk comes with a sharp intake of breath and Jake’s hand is covered in his mess as it drips out of John. John, who was already much to full, goes weak in the knees when Dirk coats his walls and pumps deep inside of him. Most of it dribbles out into Jake’s palm, where he cups his hand up to catch it. Quickly he works a third finger in while Dirk twitches through his orgasm. John doesn’t miss the intrusion, and whimpers when he’s widened farther. Jake uses the extra slickness of Dirk’s release to thrusts his fingers in. Dirk claws into John’s hips, letting Jake prepare John despite his body trying to get away from the stimulation.

Satisfied with his handiwork, Jake lets his hand drop away from John and back around his own cock, now weeping against his stomach. Some of the lube and seed dripped onto him, and he uses that to make sure he’s lubed up well. Above him, Dirk clings to John and takes a few calming breaths, letting his own body relax. He doesn’t pull out of John, and John never feels his cock even begin to soften. Dirk meets Jake’s eye, and they exchange an understanding nod. If John wanted them to, they stop. No exceptions.

Dirk carefully adjusts him and John until Jake is lined up with John’s hole and Dirk can lead him into it. Jake soothes his hands up John’s sides, rubbing along the shallow dips of John’s ribs and over the dent of his waist. Dirk slowly sinks John down, and at the first hint of Jake’s cock prodding his entrance John sucks in a sharp breath and shakes in their arms. He’s peppered in kisses from Dirk, hushed words mumbled into his skin. Jake caresses his hips, grinding his teeth while Dirk teasingly slides him against the entrance. When he finally is pushed passed the tight ring of muscle, Dirk staying still alongside him, Jake lets out the harsh air he was holding back, groaning while John’s hole opens for him. John’s voice catches in his throat, fingers tightening into Jake’s hair. He stays relaxed though, trusting them to not push him too fast.

The first inch is the hardest, after that Jake slides in and the friction is heaven. John’s a vice around him and Dirk, but still loose enough for it to be not overwhelming. Dirk’s cock rubs against his inside of John, rutting together while the walls around them massage at the same time. Jake continues to pet John, from his arms, shoulders, hips, thighs, anywhere he can reach while Dirk nibbles on his ears and neck. A few stray tears drip down John’s cheeks, quickly swiped away by Dirk. The blonde nuzzles his nose into John’s jaw, mumbling quietly. John goes limp, mewling and curling his toes.

Jake moves first, rocking his hips down as best he can and then thrusting back up into John. It makes John scream. At first he thinks he’s done something wrong, stopping instantly and shooting his eyes up from where he’d been watching himself to John. The stillness has John begging, pleading him to move. He picks back up, doing it again. Behind John, Dirk moans and squeezes the blue-eyed boy as Jake’s moving strokes his cock as well. John turns into Dirk, kissing him between open-mouthed pants and gasping for Dirk to move too. Dirk pulls out the same time Jake bucks in, then slams back in when Jake slides out. John keens, slumping down onto Jake until the older teen has to prop himself up to hold him. Dirk drags his nails down John’s hips, lifting him and dropping him on the two of them. 

John’s scrambled brain tries to form words, but only manages a few moan-laced, “Oh god, please,” and their names over and over again. Jake winds his arms around John, holding him still where Dirk was moving him in order to fuck up into him. Dirk catches his rhythm and works against it. Every slide of their cocks rubs the bundle of nerves that makes John’s eyes roll back and his breathing hard. Jake can feel every twitch of Dirk as they rut together inside of John. Dirk adjusts his thrusts until he’s ramming against John’s prostate every few hits, Jake trying to do the same. John clings to Jake, trying to muffle his voice in Jake’s shoulder. He gets louder and louder until Jake joins him. Dirk leans against John’s back, lips slicking along the knobs of his spine. He sucks on his shoulders and the back of his neck, leaving shiny red patches every time he pops off and moves to another spot.

Both the older teens lose their beat, frantically bucking into John mindlessly. John’s mouth locks open into a perfect O, his voice escalating as they rush headlong towards their respective peaks. He finishes first, when both Jake and Dirk ram in at the same time, hitting his prostate and shoving him through his release. His body snaps down around the two of them, locking them tight until they can’t move and are forced to hold still while he crashes through his orgasm with them trapped inside of him. Dirk’s eyes train onto John’s profile, laying wet smacks against his jaw while John spasms and calls out for them, his voice hoarse. Jake follows through the moment John’s limp enough for him to begin moving again, only getting in a half-thrust before his cock is twitching against Dirk’s and spilling inside of John. Dirk relishes the heat surrounding him, from John as well as Jake, and slowly works into it. The brunettes gasp in unison, overly sensitive and beyond thought when Dirk grinds against them.

He guides Jake out of John, shoulders shaking when Jake’s limp cock slicks along the underside of his. Green-eyes flicker shut and Jake collapses off to the side, curling half around John’s knees. John’s arms give under him, and he flops down onto Jake who holds him close and strokes his hair. Dirk can’t help but grin as he drags himself out to the tip, sliding back inside in a swift motion that makes John keen into Jake’s ear. The walls surrounding him ripple, the motion following up John’s back. He shivers and whimpers, Dirk savoring the sounds as he draws to his finish. It comes slow, Dirk inching closer until he can feel every pulse of it course through him. He pumps into John, muttering John’s name affectionately.

Dirk pulls out, the sticky mess he and Jake left behind trailing out after him and dripping down John’s backside. Free of Dirk’s grip, John lets his body drop, half on the bed and half on Jake. The blonde follows suit, pressing his weight down onto the both of them and cradling the smaller boy to his chest. John nuzzles Jake, mewling quietly. Jake fumbles around, patting Dirk’s arms and then shoving his shoulders to push him off. At his insistence, Dirk rolls off; choosing instead to close his body around John’s and spoon against his back. John tucks into the pile of happy teens, mumbling contently but forming no words. Jake snatches Dirk’s hand the moment it rests on John’s hips, lacing his fingers with Dirk’s longer ones and giving it a tired squeeze.

John lacks the energy to do much of anything, so he shifts until he can hook an arm around both the others and hug them close. Two sets of thin lips press into his cheeks and John smiles. Huddling down in the pile of happy lovers, John dozes off first. Dirk gives his eyes free range over John’s face, memorizing the bliss etched there. Jake’s own lidded eyes scan Dirk’s face. Dirk notices, catching the look before sighing. It’s slow, deep, but not unhappy. He leans forward, pecking Jake softly. Jake closes his eyes, falling sleep as Dirk lays back. Dirk drifts off soon after, his arms instinctively wrapping around the bundles of warmth protectively.

**Author's Note:**

> Im so sorry for any mistakes or inconsistencies. I kept putting this off an not finishing it.  
> [Here's the tumblr post](http://http://lucifer-writes.tumblr.com/post/74695721704/problem-solving-is-best-left-to-those-who-can-think/) so yall can support me there.


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